Thursday, January 1, 2015

365 days of Up

When I was a lot younger, between 10 and 21, I was an avid journal writer.
I love reading back in my journal when I was dating Marc... so romantic...
After I was married a few years journaling kind fell to a once a month thing, then every couple months and soon it was a lucky chance to catch up the highlights of the entire year.

A while after moving from Payson to Santaquin I had discovered this "blog" thing that I had been hearing so much about and actually had started getting into a few particular blogs and found them so intriguing and interesting. Finally, it hit me, I had a pretty interesting and intriguing life AND I wanted to bring awareness to Fragile X Syndrome.

Thinking that this could be kind of like journalling again I saw it as a great thing to try. I had no idea the importance of the title or URL of a blog and had NO idea how to be internet savvy so I just kept it simple: and it was about our life so I called Our Life. Nothing really creative. I didn't even really know what to write about, really, check out my first post here.
As time went on I was amazed at the things I was taking more notice of in my life.

The good and the bad.

I have been writing in this blog for almost 7 years.

I'm not famous.

I'm not the Go-To information site for Fragile X Syndrome.

I don't really make money from blogging.

I've never been recognized, "Hey! That's Rachael from Our Life!"

My family is not on the cover of any magazine or book.

We're not bringing hundreds of people to a successful diagnosis of FXS.

I don't even know if I have been a beacon to others of my beliefs.

I've watched bloggers, YouTubers, and vloggers shoot out into the world as influencers, teachers, icons and leaders that people just can't get enough of.

Heck, I've never been contacted by Disney or Dreamworks to create anything for them or to give them input on how they should portray a mentally impaired character in one of their cartoons...

I just want the world to know what Fragile X is, how it affects a family, how our beliefs affect our lives and try to put fear from peoples minds when it comes to understanding mental impairment and Autistic-like tendencies.

I've been discouraged that I am still just an average writer, and average blogger and realizing that I am so not into marketing myself and realizing how much effort it takes to get out there and known.

I worry that my Facebook friends probably get sick of seeing that I've posted another blog post and might have just hidden me to save them the hassle of seeing it pop up...  It's OK. I still love you if you've done that. (smile)

So I just kinda stopped.

I thought that I was putting myself out there in the world for nothing.

Why haven't all these blog posts (1011 including this one) shot Fragile X Syndrome into the limelight and helped families receive diagnosises, given youth an understanding of the struggles a mentally impaired youth goes through.

I guess I'm competitive or something.

I just have to keep up with all those that are doing great things and getting their posts shared worldwide to promote or bring awareness of their cause.

I've realized that that was all very dumb.

I'm not blogging for attention or praise or fame.

I'm blogging so that I can read back on my past, see how far I've come and know that I can make it that much farther.

It's crazy to realize when I started this blog that Baby wasn't even a thought in our minds.

I can't believe I raised 3 children, not my own, through their poignant teen years and served to tell the tale (wink).

I still cry when I look back and read about Baby's diagnosis of FXS.

I always giggle as I see the funny times caught.

I grin with pride when I read what Marc and I have gone through and are still together 18+ years

In January of 2013 I hit a big low, but I refused to let it keep me down so I decided to post every day for 7 days of positive things, "7 days to Up" is what I called it.

So, I have decided that since writing brings me happiness that I am going to make a goal to write some thing everyday even if it's little. I want to challenge myself to write 365 days of Up and see if it makes my 2015 just that much greater.

I'm not going to fall into the blogger competition and feel like I need to be followed by hundreds of people to make a difference. If I make a difference in my own life that that is enough.

I am happy to be writing for me and my family again!


Here's to 364 more days left of Up!

2 remarks:

Paola said...

Please keep writing Rachael! I love reading your blog and hearing about your adventures, you have a great sense of humor. Your blog has taught me so much about FX and the importance of teaching my children to be nice, compationate and to treat everyone the way they would like to be treated. You guys are an amazing family!

Marc and Rachael said...

Thanks Paola! That means a lot and I am just glad that I have remembered why I blog and will start back up again.