Thursday, January 22, 2015

You're better than you think.

I got to flit around the stage today like a beautiful butterfly!

This must be said with the thought of that chubby caterpillar from "A Bug's Life" in your mind's eye... it just makes it kinda funny:

Anyway, but really I did! My wings were a LOT bigger though! That's what made it so fun. Oh my goodness it was fun! I couldn't stop smiling as I leaped and danced about the stage learning the choreography.

That was a good UP for me today, not to mention the play is all starting to come together and it is just getting more fun.

But there was a small moment today that has stuck with me all day.

As I was practicing with the group one of our numbers, I was encouraging fellow players in saying that if I can do something like this, then anyone can.

I'm really hard on myself. I'm sure that is part of what adds to my depression issues.

I've never been confident.

When I say that it surprises people because I am outgoing and loud.

It would seem that self confidence struggles wouldn't go hand in hand with being outgoing and friendly.

I think it's just my defense mechanism... if I'm fun, funny, or entertaining then no one has to focus on ... me... or so I seem to think.

Well, today my friend, who is also the music director said, "Rachael, you're better than you think you are."

I don't exactly now why but that just sat with me today.

It was a compliment, really.

At least I took it as one.

But, it was also a good reminder that I just put myself down too often.

My sister said the same thing to me yesterday. She actually kinda got ofter me for it (in a loving way of course).

I need to learn to build others up without putting myself down.

So I guess that was an UP/down moment.

It was a good learning moment for me.

Other UPs of the day:

Brother tied his shoes this morning! Both shoes, all by himself, with no whining!


Another up for the day was that I took and made the time to make dinner and it was all healthy with a home made, made up on the fly, spinach pesto cream sauce

And last, but, certainly not least, was that we remembered to read scriptures as a family tonight.

It was an UP kind of day!

Day 22 of 365 Days of UP

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