For the Love of Life

Oh the story I will weave for you today...

This morning I went to my sister's house to hang out with her and my aunt Aleesa. We had fantasticly huge waffles—light, fluffy, angelic waffles.

I had four of them!

They were not small.

Oh well.

After we were done solving the trundle and bunk bed saga with Aleesa we went our separate ways.

I went quickly because I realized that I had been there so long I would probably miss Sister getting home off the bus. Vroom vroooooom!

I made it.

I nurse Baby and load both her and Sister back into the car to head over to my mom's.

Why?

I don't know. Just wanted to visit I guess. Well, actually I had an agenda. I was going to buy some seeds at the greenhouse that is close to her house (hmm, close? not really. small town, nothing is close, but 5 miles away is close...).

I had so much fun hanging out eating pomegranate popsicles (oh, and all you pomegranate lovers out there—they are fantastic. mmmm.) that I lost track of time and realized that because it was early out day and needed to get home to get Brother of his bus. So in my rush I forgot the seed errand and just headed home.

I got home and nursed Baby again.

I talk to Marc to see if he wants to go to Walmart when he gets home. He says that he would like to go. Then I nix the idea because I remember I want to start planting the garden while Brother is at scouts and Marc can help so I need to go get seeds. I decide to just run all the rest of my errands at the same time. I mean Smith's is having their 5 for $5 sale on LIFE cereal!! Must go!!

Got Brother off the bus and loaded him, and the girls back into the car.

Why?

Because I am dumb.

Why am I dumb?

You will soon see.

We go to Walmart first. Heaven shines down upon me and in the cart return next to me is the coveted 2 seater cart. Yes, the cart of dreams. The one that keeps older children in one place... in front of you within arms reach at all times. And yes, this time they actually stayed in the cart. Baby was asleep. All was well. I even found a gallon of bubbles for $3. Who doesn't need a gallon of bubbles? Then to go with the gallon of bubbles I should get something completely useless that costs only $1 to go along with it.

Bubble wands.

This is where it all goes down hill.

No they didn't spill them.

That would have been easy.

The bubble wands have this little plasticy thing with the cardboard tag coming out the top. Apparently Sister didn't want it on and proceeded to take it off without me knowing because I am browsing the clearanced layering shirt for $3. (Ah. $3. It must me my magic number.)

Brother yells out, "Mom, mom, mom, mom," the lady next to me is wondering when I will respond. Don't bother me, it is nothing important. I am browsing the yellow, green and some kind of salmon pink left-over layering shirts. This is a real deal here.

On about the 20th "mom" I calmly walk over to see that she has indeed taken of the plastic thingy along with the tag from the thing. I take the card board tag with the bar code on it and place it in the cart along with the plastic covering.

No biggy.

As I browse to another part of the store, trying to remember why I actually came to this store, I hear a plasticy thing fall to the floor.

Sister screams hysterically.

I calmly bend over to pick it up and hand it to her.

Whatever blows your hair back kiddo.

If you want to hold on to some stupid plasticy thing, be my guest.

I continue into the fruit isle, and I hear the plasticy thing drop again but this time I ignore it.

Why?

I don't know.

Maybe I thought it wouldn't be as big a deal as it became.

Sister screamed at the top of her lungs. Crocodile tears streaming. Face reddening. People staring.

I am smiling.

It's funny.

Kind of.

But as I am going through the line Baby begins to cry, I am sure, because Sister is screaming... still! She didn't hardly take a breath.

I giggled as the cashier put my stuff through and bagged it. I don't think she knew what to think.

Sister screams louder on the way out to the door and through the parking lot.

She screams while she is in the cart and I am trying to put in crying Baby, and I feel my blood starting to sizzle!

I get her out of the cart, frazzled as can be. Me, not her, frazzled.

And then I head to Smith's.

Ya, you would think I would just bag it and go home.

But, this is her. This is what she does. So, I will plug through.

I gave her some gum to help her center herself (chewing helps, trust me).

And then we head to Smith's to get our LIFE cereal.

Now, on the ad it says, "Sale price 5 for $10. With Fresh Values card you receive $5 off purchase. One $5 discount per transaction."

I decide to get 10 and just run 2 transactions.

Smart huh?

That's what I thought.

After a hectic wander through Smith's, I approach the cashier. Now, remember my kids like to drive carts around, so I have two of them trailing behind me running over my heels in line and I am holding Baby in my arms because she didn't want to be in her carseat.

My arm is going numb.

I chose the pregnant cashier because she looked nice and I thought would be good about my coupons for my L'Oreal make-up I was purchasing. I put 5 boxes of LIFE on the belt and then placed a divider and then placed the rest of my groceries. I was figuring around a $35 purchase in my head with my coupons and their great sales. It was 40% L'Oreal cosmetics and then the LIFE sale.

Anyway, the cashier politely removed my divider and said that I didn't need to do it in two transactions and that it would work just fine, she didn't know why the ad said only one $5 discount per transaction. "Oh, OK," I said. I then handed her my 2 coupons for $1 off each for the make-up. I got some $7 mascara that was marked down to $4.19 and with my coupons that was $2.19. Sweet!

You know how they tell you the total at the end. Well, she told me and I just nodded because I really couldn't hear her over Sister whining and my arm numbing (yes, arm numbing can cause lack of hearing—you can't focus on hearing because you are busy numbing).

I drag all the kids out to the car. Unload everything. Check my receipt.

Did I buy 2 masacaras?

Check bags, check again.

Nope, just one.

And it was $4.19 not $6.99.

Urgh!

I was charged $6.99 twice for one masacara that was on sale for $4.19.

I sit and ponder if it is worth trying to talk Sister back out of the car and dragging them all back into the store again to get my refund.

I decide that $10 is worth it.

Back in, crying, numb arm and all.

Wait 10 minutes in agony.

Get my refund.

Go back to the car.

Get everyone in.

Check my receipt again because I realize that even with my $10 back I still spent $40 instead of the $35 I had guesstimated.

Hm. Only one $5 discount. Not two like I had planned.

Aaarrgh!

Note to self: Don't use the pregnant cashiers. They have enough on their minds.

No, I didn't go back for the other $5 discount.

I only have so much patience. I figured, $1.50 for LIFE cereal was still good... enough.

...

After Brother got home from Scouts at I nursed Baby.

Then we all loaded up in the car with Marc to head back over to Walmart...

for fun...

enough said.

Ya, I know.