Brighton Ski Lodge trip and KUTV interview

We have had a great opportunity in the past to have been invited by friends to go to their family's cabin that has a spring fed pool. Our kids LOVE it and we really wanted to be able to find a place kind of like that that we can plan to go to each year and let the kids just have a relaxing time. We decided on Brighton Lodge. It has family history there for us so it also holds some sentimental value. We went over the holiday this last weekend (after our little hospital visit) and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. 3 and 9 just wanted to live in the hot tub there, they were little fish. It was really fun too, because there was a BBQ and picnic tables near the hot tub so we swam and BBQ'd steaks and veggie cabobs. It was a hit and the kids are excited for next year's trip! 9 sad he wants to stay ten nights next time...

We also took a walk around the lake that is up there. We thought the kids would really enjoy it, but for one reason or other 9 was dismayed and just wanted to go home (the lodge) but we finally made it. You will see some pictures of his "excitement."

All in all, we had an awesome time up there. It was even cooler because we were the only people there, the manager of the place didn't even stay there! So we basically ran the place as if it were our own cabin and got to leave without having to scrub the toilets. We stayed up late watching videos and playing games while drinking some really great hot chocolate! It was actually kinda cold that night. We had fun so enjoy the pictures. Oh, and don't get to worried of the pics of my in my swimsuit, I know my legs have not seen the sun but, I was excited to show off my belly and my swimsuit isn't going to cover it much longer. I was 21 weeks then and I am 22 weeks now and I have grown quite a bit!

This was right outside the door of our room—it was gorgeous

Here's our walk around the lake...

The little ones gave up walking—fragile x low muscle tone doesn't help this out any

9 is toast...

...really toast...

walking back to the lodge after getting expensive refreshment at the local cafe/store—I am a mom with a mission: get my kids back to the hot tub!

Ya, I know, my legs blend in with the white rocks behind—now I've said it so you don't have to...

Beautiful Brighton Canyon

Today was a very exciting day at our house and for the Fragile X community. KUTV, Channel 2 News came to do a story on us today for Fragile X Syndrome. It will be featured on the Parent2Parent. It won't air till the week after next, she will email me to tell me the air date and time—I will post it so you can all view it.

I was so nervous, and then you stick a mic on me and bright light camera in my face — it adds to the whole holy-crap-I-am-going-to-be-on-TV-do-I-have-anything-in-my-teeth scenario. But they were very nice and I think I answered the questions pretty thoroughly. I will tell you the truth though, you can't cover everything from your journey to your children's diagnoses, to what Fragile X Syndrome is, to how it affects your family, to who are the carriers and how is it passed on in only a 10 minute interview which then gets cut to 1 1/2 minutes on air. I think, though, that it went well. The cameraman had many questions after the interview so I think it was interesting enough—hopefully the viewers will also want answers and check out the fragilex.org website.

So anyway, the funniest part of the whole interview was that 9 wanted so badly to be part of the interview but his anxieties just couldn't quite handle it so he would stand behind me or walk behind me with a blanket over his head. Ha! I think the interviewer was getting a chuckle out of the fact that I just kept going even though there my blanketed child continued to wander behind me. I think she came to realize it was the norm. We have been laughing about it all day. They got some great shots of the kids and I am excited to see how it is all pieced together in the end.

They were so nice and genuine and I actually really enjoyed having them in our home. Junior got a picture of the three of us at the end of the interview and filming.

My worst nightmare and a little miracle

So on Thursday night I was feeling really sick and was experiencing some painful cramping. We had been swimming and just having a good time so I though maybe I had done too much so I laid down, but I just had this sick feeling there was something wrong with the baby. I realized then that I hadn't felt her move since early that morning and it was now 7pm. I tried not to panic, ate something sugary and then laid down on my left side waiting for any sign of movement... nothing...

I called the hospital labor and delivery and explained the cramping and the not feeling any movement. They told me that I should drink a large glass of orange juice, lay down on my left side and count 10 kicks from the baby in one hour. So I did that, I even waited 2 hours... nothing...

I called them again and they told me that I should come check into the ER and they would admit me to labor and delivery and they would check for a heartbeat.

So, trying not to cry or panic I calmly filled Marc in and then we lied to the kids and told them that I was sick and they just wanted to make sure I was OK, and then we left. The drive was silent until Marc asked what was going through my mind, "Fear, and trying not to think the worst. I hope this is all just a mistake and everything is fine. You know, me being over-the-top worried."

So we get to the ER, do the whole fill out the papers thing. The entrance lady was asking me all kinds of questions and Marc had to keep correcting me because my mind was just elsewhere.

Finally we get up to Labor and Delivery and a nurse quickly admits me to a room and she hooks me up and checks my blood pressure and all that. I am thinking the whole time, "Just check the baby! I am fine! What about my baby!" But, me, being the patient girl that I am just lay there on the table waiting for her to finish her routine.

She puts the thing (whatever that is called) on my belly with all that jelly stuff and she moves it around, she looks at me, nothing... and moves it around some more, nothing... for 10 minutes she tries to find a heartbeat, nothing...

At this point I am just hoping she is a dumb nurse and just can't find the heartbeat. She can see the worry in my eyes and says she is going to go get the doplar. Hmm, I think, that sounds official, we will find it then, nothing...

She leaves the room...

I look at Marc, and I say, "OK, now I am scared." I can feel the tears welling up but, I have this gut feeling that I am just overreacting and all is well.

The nurse comes back in and tells me that she has contacted the doctor and that he has ordered an ultra sound. He also wanted her to tell me that if they don't find a heartbeat that they will send me home and talk about options in the morning—AAAaaaaahhhhhh!!!!! Can we wait to tell me that when we know for sure there is bad news. Now I am really freaking out! Of course on the outside I am still calm, but inside I am terrified!

The ultra sound guy comes in earlier than scheduled—sweetheart—and it takes him a while to hook everything up. Now, picture me laying on the bed, not knowing if my baby is still alive....

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Ya! Can we hurry here. I don't want to hear about the fact that they ordered this ultra sound machine only a year ago and yet it still has problems every once in a while and how they wish they could send it back and get a new one, and the whole chit chat and giggling about it being like a stupid computer, ha ha! Let's see the baby already!!!!

He puts the ultra sound on my stomach, nothing... but quickly something, she was just really, really, really low! He said, "Wow, I haven't seen them this low unless they are ready to deliver!"

"Where's the heartbeat?" I ask.

There it is.

That sweet hearbeat.

Oh, I love that sound.

Thank you, thank you, I say over and over again. The ultra sound guy probably thought I was thanking him but, I was thanking the Lord for answering my prayers.

The miracle in all this was that the ultra sound guy took the time to let us watch her. We got to see her yawn while stretching her arm. We got to see her eyes move from side to side, throw her head back and squirm upward to get in a different position. It was miraculous! 21 weeks and 1 day at the time, and it was amazing. She is so real, so alive, so beautiful! I love her already. And now I am noticing EVERY movement and don't take a single one for granted.

Horse Ride,Last minute campout, Chess and TV

Well, since I have been so excited about our baby I haven't been keeping up on pics. So, here are the latest:

Marc went on a horse ride up the local canyon on a trail called the narrows. Well, it started off to be that trail, then they blazed their own trail for a while, then ended up on the original trail on the way back. "Lotta bushwackin'" as he put it. Man, he is a real cowboy when he says that! Woo!

the friends he went with

if you look really close you will see the bull elk in the middle and the other bull off to the left in the trees

Then Jessie and Joel invited us on a one-nighter camp out to one of our favorite spots so of course we went! I can't believe how often we have been camping lately. I guess since we don't do the Disneyland thing we get to camp instead. 17 was our best wood gatherer...

ya, it's hard work lifting that dutch oven when you are pregnant...

the family hike

the big boy hike and scenery, even a grasshopper

Can I just say how much I LOVE 9's friends. They just see 9 for who he is and not for the disability he has. I would never in a million years think that he could learn a game like chess, nor would he let me teach it to him anyway. So you can understand my love for his little friend when she takes the time to teach chess to him. She is so patient, kind and loving and I seriously could not ask for better people in this area we live in. 9 is so blessed to have friends like he does. It makes me cry knowing that children can be so patient and on-judgemental. Especially when you know they are perfectly capable to make fun of and criticize as too often 9 has witnessed first hand. So, I am grateful for those who don't see the disability but, instead, see the person that he is. Thank you, and you know who you are, to those who are there for me and my children.


Oh, and to top my day off! I was just contacted by KUTV about doing a story on Fragile X Syndrome! Yahoo! This is great news and I hope that all goes well! Wish me luck, I will keep you all posted!

It's a....

Sorry I didn't want to ruin it yet for those who have the first part of the blog entry in their sidebar...

So the 25% of you who voted for a boy were...





WRONG!

It's a Girl!!!

Yay! We are happy either way. I am just excited to get things ready and know that I can continue to hang onto 3's things to pass on! Yay! So exciting!!!

9 really wanted it to be a boy so he was very disappointed at first, even to the point of tears and name calling. But, nobody remind him of that because now all he knows is that he is so excited to be the big brother of two sisters. I think it was just the initial shock of it not being a boy.

I bought pink balloons, pick ice cream, pink treats and pink soda to help celebrate! So exciting!

Here is a ultra sound picture of her face. (Those of you who can decipher ultra sound pictures: isn't she cute — those who think it just looks like TV fuzz: you'll get to see her later)

Journal Moments

OK, so I haven't journaled for a bit so here it is.

This baby doesn't kick much but, it does make its presence known. I get worried sometimes and make sure to press my hand on my belly until it kicks at me to get out of its space. Tee hee! I have a feeling that when this baby is born it will want its own space. And yes, sadly, I still call this baby "it" because I haven't had the tell-tell ultra sound yet. But, tomorrow I get to find out!!! Yay!!! AT 5:45 pm Tuesday we get to go see this little baby and find out what we are having. I will do a poll, I think, and see what everyone thinks. Doesn't give you much time but, hey, it will still be fun! So far, 9 and 3 say it is a boy. Ya, even 3 says she is having a baby brother! 17 says boy because she is going with what 3 says. Marc says it's a boy and I haven't said what I think out loud yet. So, take your guesses in the poll off to the right.

Something funny that 3 said: She asked my sister if she had a baby in her tummy. She said "no" and 3 replied, "oh, I sorry." Ha! Love it!

I sit back in amazement everyday in worry and aw that my kids are all growing up so fast before my eyes. I mean, I am 32 and having my daughter get her senior pictures!!! WaaaaA! I don't care what anyone says, I know I didn't give birth to her but after 7 years of tears, worry, concern, love and complete compassion over a child, yours or not by birth, they are yours in every sense of the word! So yes, I have a senior!!! Wew!

My baby won't be my baby much longer. 19 weeks and she will be the second to youngest! Holy cow that is a weird feeling! I have been trying to hold 3 more and more because I worry that she needs more love before I have to focus on a younger one. Which, is going to be very interesting to experience considering that she always HAS to have mommy! Oh, boy! Heavenly Father, I hope you know what you are doing here...

I have found this awesome internet radio thing called PANDORA that I just love. Type whatever genre of music you like and it finds it and compiles it all for you. It is the best. I can listen to Jonas Brothers, Taylor Swift, Click Five, Demi Lavato, and others like them without interruption. Love it. For Sunday I listen to my Kenneth Cope station and it is GREAT or the Mormon Tabernacle choir! You should try it!

We have loved having our chickens around. We always have to go out and watch them, just because they are interesting to watch. Cute little things. We won't be getting eggs until November so they are not earning their keep yet, but we still love them.

I worry about labor for this baby. Will I go early like I did with 3 and 9? 9 was four weeks early and 3 was five weeks early. But, eerily they were both born at about the same time and labor started at about he same time. Both times I went into the hospital at 11pm and one was born at 2:51 am and one was born at 2:53 am—hmmmm. I wonder, will I be able to predict 6 weeks early and born at 2:55am??? NO, I hope not, I really don't want to come that early—I hope that things go well. You know how we are when we are pregnant, worry, wonder, worry, and dream the worst, and what is the deal with hearing the worst.

None of you better leave comments talking about the horror stories you have heard or experienced. I don't want to hear them, I have come up with enough nightmare scenarios in my own mind all by myself without your help. Oh, and when I start getting really big don't say that I don't look pregnant in my face or that I don't look pregnant from behind. Just say I look cute and leave it at that, you don't need to embellish the compliment hoping that I won't notice that my butt is as big as my belly, or that my face looks as if I am storing up for the winter, or that my nose is wider than my chin. Believe me, I notice those things no matter how many sweet things you say to me hoping that I won't pay attention to that. Believe me, I am excited and grateful enough for this little spirit to join our family that I don't care how I look as long as the doctor says me and the baby are healthy. So when you are out for a walk with your dogs, please don't stop and say, "Holy cow! When is that baby due? You look miserable!" or "Oh, bless your heart, you look like you are about to burst." (Don't ever say bless your heart with an insult—it doesn't help...) Ya, I look cute now, I am only half way there. It's gonna get bigger people! A lot bigger! I will try to dress appropriately so as not to scare any of you but, let's face it, there may be days when I am just not thinking and I wear something that looks like it belongs on a super model instead of a 8 1/2 month pregnant woman with her belly button poking out an inch but, maybe I was feeling sexy that day! (TEe hee!) And maybe I may wear the dreaded plaid dress that is hanging in my closet waiting for my "fatter" days but, don't say anything other that I look cute, don't say the dress looks cute. Tell me I look cute, because we all know the dress doesn't look cute. I am desperate at that point... And if I am still in nursery at 8 months, can someone come save me! I mean seriously, I can only handle so much. Sunday there were 15 kids in there ages 18 months to 3! Wow! Pregnancy hormones, weak stomach muscles, the need to pee every 10 minutes and 15 toddlers are not exactly the best combination. Don't get me wrong, love your kids, but, it isn't gonna be long before one of you see my in the hall sweating and balling! Tee hee! (I am actually laughing out loud as I type this.) We Mormons are too cute! I love us!

OK, I think that is pretty much all for now. Oh, and 9 wants to make sure that I tell you all I am "big as a balloon!" I love that kid. And, yes, Wayne, you can say that too and I won't be offended. (At least not yet, when I am the size of a blimp, you are no longer aloud to make any such comments or I may cry or even, possibly, smack you!)

Senior Pic Peek

Gallery Image came all the way out here just to take 17's senior pics. Here is just a sample of the 300 awesome! pics they took. They did an awesome job. And since, Gallery Image is my Sister-in-law and brother they gave me permission to edit the pics if I wanted to. I did it just for fun, the pics didn't need it, I just had artsy fun. I just chose a few of my faves!

If you want to have them take pictures for you click on this link for Gallery Image but don't forget to come back to see how photogenic my daughter is, oh, and I threw in one of 9 because he wanted to be included—so cute!

We went to several locations and changes outfits three times, but the cool thing all the locations were close to home. We even went to a playground and 3, 9 and 13 got to have some fun while we took pics—yes, I had to take all the kids with us... don't ask...

photos by