Thursday, January 19, 2012

I gotta feelin'

This whole move started with a feeling in my heart that I knew our family was supposed to make a change.

As things progressed and we sold our house within 5 days in a market the way it is, I just "knew" that our short sale home we had an offer on would be ours by the time we had to move out of our house. After all, I had a good feeling and everything else was falling into place.

As our move-out date drew nearer I could see that moving from one house to another of our own was not going to happen. I had warned my parents a few times that we may have to move in with them until we had a house but, I assured them it would only be for a month at the most.

So when we were packing up to move that weekend, it felt so weird knowing we were just in interim and didn't have anything of our own. I felt kind of lost. It's weird to go from owning a home for 13 years of our 15 year marriage and then moving in with my parents. We had never lived with either of our parents. It felt weird to know we were relying, so profoundly, on my parents to give us a place to stay for our family of 5.

The day we moved we had so many people come to help that it was almost overwhelming. Not because of all the people, but because of all the love we felt from so many in our ward (a ward is an area of people who combine to make a congregation in the LDS church) and neighborhood. I was amazed at the ladies from the Relief Society who came to clean my house in preparation for the new family to move in. There was a LOT of work to be done and they did it. I think that I stood there, mostly in amazement and dazed stupor as everyone worked so hard on our behalf.

We moved some of our necessities to my parents and they were all smiles as we moved all our things in. It is crowded but, definitely do-able.

Our family spent one last Sunday at church with our ward that we were leaving and that was absolutely, hands down, the hardest part.

I cried a lot saying goodby to my comfort zone and circle of friends and family.

I started feeling a bit hopeless and confused as to why I was leaving such a wonderful life.

Nothing seemed sure.

Then the primary kids that I teach music to every Sunday made me a blanket with their hand prints on it and their names. The Primary Presidency gave it to me and said that this blanket was so that I would remember them and know that they had their hands around me giving me one big hug.

Then I sobbed.

Then the kids gathered around me and waited for hugs. The spirit was so strong in those kids.

Then I blubbered.

When I got "home" I felt a peace come over me.

This was so hard to leave my comfort zone but, I still knew in my heart that what we are doing is the right choice.

Things here have been going so much better than I ever could have hoped in my wildest dreams.

My kids, by default of Fragile X, have a VERY hard time with change and transition. I thought that the whole time we were here would be a mess of night wakings, tantrums, fall-aparts, and melt-downs everyday, all day.

We have had very few.

Quite miraculous if you ask me.

Brother is right at home singing everyday

our room

Marc likes to help

all the kids sleep in the toy room - they aren't complaining...

the crowded kitchen

I know Heavenly Father has a plan for us.

I just have to keep holding to that good feeling I had that started this whole ball rolling.

This is a test of my faith.

A test of my belief in Heavenly Father's love for me and my family.

My parents have had the unique opportunity of getting to know my children on an entirely different level and they are loving it. It has given them a new-found perspective of their lives.

We went to my mom and dad's ward this last Sunday and we were welcomed with open arms. My kids were so welcomed in that they did exceptionally well and I was beyond impressed that we all made it through without any melt-downs. In fact, Brother went to all his classes on his own and was so proud of himself. Sister went to her classes and only needed me for the last 15 minutes. Baby didn't want to leave her class because she was enjoying it so much. I got to sit with my best friend from childhood who is also living with her mom for a time. I felt like I was a kid again seeing people I had grown up with. I was also reminded what a loving ward it is.

Marc was not there with us because he was in our old ward to serve one last time as 2nd counselor in the Bishopric and to train his replacement. I am excited for the new counselor. I know he will do an outstanding job and his family will be so blessed during his time of service.

Marc has felt a little lost without his calling. I can see that his concern for the members of the ward are still with him and it is hard for him to let go.

But, again, we both take comfort and solace in knowing that we are doing the right thing.

I wish I could put all my feelings into words but, it is so hard to express everything.

So in summation of our situation:
-We are still waiting on our short sale and it has even had a bit of a hiccup in the process with listing agents changing but it should work in our benefit.
-We are having so much fun here.
-My kids are doing well.
-I am a little tired of driving such a long distance to take the kids to their schools everyday.
-But, they are both doing VERY well in school.
-We may be here for more than a month (insert laugh here)
-We are going to Florida in 2 1/2 weeks



Yep, you read it right.

Why not?

We have no house.

Why not go have a good time at my brother's place in Florida while we are waiting this whole short sale thing out?

Woo hoo!

I have a feeling we are going to have a lot of fun!

2 remarks:

Staci said...

We miss you all and I am glad to hear all the adjusting is going well.

Mariah said...

Thanks for the update... have fun in Florida!