Monday, May 16, 2011

Lessons learned, then and now

I remember when I was a kid, my sister and I used to put tinfoil on our teeth when we would pretend to have braces.  —Don't bite down on tinfoil

When I was young I would trick my sister into smelling my feet.  —pre-teen feet enclosed in plastic shoes with polyester socks NEVER smell good

You can make anything with hay bales and plastic.  —But you may end up with a little hay in your hair after getting out of the home made pool

Old shower curtains make great mermaid tails for splashing in at the side of the hay bale and plastic pool.  —never slide down a metal slide with a shower curtain wrapped around your legs

If you play sick to stay home from school don't heat the thermometer on the heater to fake a temperature. —unless you want to be rushed to the ER

Kids can say mean things. —especially when you are a third grader wearing a size 9 white shoe with flourescent green shoe laces (I don't care if it was the 80's)

Never stick your finger into a cage full of Mink. —they don't let go once they bite down

Growing up with enough tractors and cars to play hide-and-go-seek in makes you a nerd in Junior High, but in High School they love it. —every thing you have or do makes you a nerd in Junior High

I learned to be grateful for any set of wheels I could drive on my own after I had to ride on the mail tray of my dad's mail jeep on the mornings he took me to Driver's Ed. —mail trays in old mail jeeps are VERY rattly, cold and uncomfortable

Your dad's ugly orange '76 Chevy is an embarrassing eye-sore.  —until you learn to drive it and pick up your guy friends

If your mom tosses and orange to you to show how cool she is to your friends who are at the house don't throw it back to show what a good aim you have. —you're mom will end up with a black eye and you will have to keep the split orange in your room for a week as a reminder of your stupidity

I ate 3 grilled cheese sandwiches before a surprise date.  —never eat 3 grilled cheese sandwiches before going for a surprise date on a private airplane ride

I was VERY skinny in high school but, my nickname was "Chunky."  —you get a nickname like that when you puke cheese sandwiches on a private plane ride

Never talk about someone in a bad way. —you may be talking to that person's sister

When you are first married and don't have much money for a great apartment, at least spring for the apartment with thicker walls. —chances are there is another newly wed couple in thin-walled apartment next to yours

I rushed off to church one morning in a new skirt and nylons. —never rush to church in a new skirt that sticks to your nylons... you will end up showing off more that your knees

People do NOT forget seeing woman with her skirt cinched all the way up to her waist. —you can never tell an embarrassing story too many times

Don't look at someone's children and think you would do better. —you'll get a big surprise when you have kids of your own

Man, I love remembering all these funny life lessons!

Now here are some pictures of my kids that got me thinking about funny memories.
It looks like Sister is carrying a club to bed... I guess you never know what might happen while you are asleep...

Actually, Marc was putting her to bed and she had a blister on her hand so, naturally, she asked him to bandage it. Apparently daddy doesn't know where we keep the small bandaging supplies.  I laughed so hard when I saw these pictures.

After seeing the bang-up job dad could do with a bandage, she settled for a small band-aid (smile)
This is me in my pj's working on design work and listening to my favorite Sherlock Holmes movie

This is me giving Marc the look that says, "OK, that is enough pictures of me in my pj's."  The lesson I learned here was to be grateful I still had my make-up on (smile)
You should take a picture of yourself in a hard-hat at least once a year...
Never spit in the wind... I know you can't see it, but a drooling child and wind are really not a good mix
It's never too early to teach your child the love of reading. AND never let your husband take a picture of you at the wrong angle when you are wearing white shorts... I mean knees look like they are the size of my head!

It is impossible to have too many pictures of your kids... really, it is.
You can always look cool when you are wearing sunglasses... even if you are wearing the ones that belong to your wife.

If you can't get your son to come out from hiding behind you for a picture, try this angle...

6 remarks:

Joel and Jessie said...

aaah, what a good read! Loved it!

seesuerun said...

I remeber many of these. I think you should write for a magazine :) So fun to read.

Julie said...

Such words of wisdom!! And I can relate to many of them! I love this post!

Mariah said...

Now I want details of the stories that came before the insights of wisdom.

AND - how can you still look so gorgeous late at night, working in your p.j.'s?

AND - Only a graphic designer would even notice those knees. I didn't even catch it till you said something... lovely knees that they are.

Rochelle said...

Loved this post!!!

John said...

:) made me smile