Tuesday, July 10, 2012

I'm wigging out!

So it's just been one of those days... or really 3 days.

I know, I know, I have been so positive lately but, this morning was the last straw!

Let me 'splain. (In case you don't know what "'splain" means you should watch "The Princess Bride" more often--it means explain said in a strong spanish accent.)

I love apricots.

I love free things.

So when I get to pick free apricots I am a double winner.

Sometimes when picking fruit you have to really get into the tree, you know, not be afraid of the branches and laugh when the fruit falls on your head.

However I wasn't expecting and earwig to fall down my shirt.

I immediately did the get-the-earwig-out-of-my-shirt dance which included the bending-over-and-shake-it-out-of-the-bra boogie.

But, you know how it is, you still feel like the creepy-crawly is still doing the creepy, crawly thing in your shirt. Every time you feel anything even remotely crawly you freak out and think it must be the earwig that fell down your shirt that never got out. I was brave and ignored the "crawly" sensations assuming it was only the "wigging out" worry of the earwig still being in there.

Later that night when I was changing out of my clothes into my pajamas...

an earwig...

fell out of my shorts...

still wiggling.


Those creepy crawlies that I was "imagining" were real.


Oh, but it just gets better.

Yesterday I picked apricots again, but, this time, I wore a shirt that was practically a turtle neck. I was taking NO chances.


No earwig down my shirt.

This story continues, but not until I tell you about what happened when we went to get Snow Cones with Marc's family for Family Home Evening last night.

Brother is gone on his campout (he must be doing well because we haven't gotten a phone call yet) so Marc and I are confident that we can handle the two girls while getting snow cones with the family...

We get to the snow cone shack and immediately Baby is falling apart because she can't get the snow cone quick enough. Marc and I are taking turns trying to handle her and help her to not completely melt down while waiting for her snow cone to come.

Finally, she get's her snow cone and I was even so smart as to get the pina colada so she didn't get and bright stains all over her summer dress. I told Marc that I wanted Green Apple and Raspberry on mine and I took her to the table and sat her down to work on her snow cone.

The snow cone was piled high in her styrofoam cup, her seat was low and the table was high. The snow cone came about to her forehead so she was struggling with trying to get the snow into her mouth with the spoon. She wants to do things herself so I let her work on accomplishing eating the snow cone while I start into my delectable red and green snow cone.

One bite.

Then Baby cries because she just spilled her attempt of a spoon full.

I get a napkin, clean it off the table and then put some napkins down in front of her to catch any further spills.

Second, third and fourth bite.

Baby cries because she just can't seem to get the snow to her mouth.

So I set my snow cone down on the table and come to her aid.

I see that she is not figuring out that the snow cone is too high up for her to successfully get the snow to her mouth before it falls to its death on the pavement. I decide to pick her up out of her seat to prop her up higher so she can eat it more successfully.

Baby does not understand when you are trying to help her.

She's like an infant.

She thought that this was the end of her snow cone eating moment and she was NOT going to have that. So she wigs out and flails her legs, body and arms to squirm from my hands.

Of course she topples my red and green snow cone off of the table and onto her lap...

which ensues more wigging out because she just got 3 cups of wet, red and green snow dumped onto her legs and dress. (Good thing she got the pina colada.)

Her wigging out caused quite a scene as I am sure everyone thought I was torturing her. I tried everything I could think of to calm her and put her at ease all while knowing that my delectable snow cone was melted all over the concrete.

Finally, after about 15 minutes I was able to get Baby calm enough to let me feed her her snow cone while she sat in the safety of the suburban.

I was physically and emotionally exhausted.

To help with my emotions I edited some of my photos I had taken because I really enjoy that.

Finally when I was ready to go to bed I brought my water cup full of ice still, set it on the table next to my big box of free apricots and trotted off to bed.

Sister woke me up this morning, excited for the day to begin. I was still so groggy but prodded through getting her set for the morning so I could lay back down in bed.

I figured since I was up I would take my thyroid medicine.

I grabbed my water cup that was now full of melted ice from last night.

Popped in my pill and chugged down some warm-ish water.

You know that moment at the end of your drink when you close your mouth over the straw so the water doesn't squirt out at you... well, it was then that I felt something not watery slide down my tongue and down my throat.

I am pretty darn sure it was an earwig.

Yep, remember, I set my cup by the box of apricots?

Earwigs crawl.

Yep, I am pretty sure I swallowed an earwig this morning.
(It reminds me of this scene from another favorite movie)

And all during this post I swear it is crawling down there.

I just hope it doesn't come out in my shorts...

If you want to read an old post that this one reminds me a lot of go here.
Really you should read it, it's funny...

3 remarks:

Brittany said...

Quite the adventure! You have a gift with writing...I'm just sorry your misadventures gave me a good laugh, especially because I was present for the earwig down the shirt :)

Julie said...

Just reading about earwigs makes my skin crawl! I just decided to take my thyroid meds with a water bottle with a sealed lid! Thanks for the laughs!

Karen Mortensen said...

Oh my. Never dull with you. That story just made me quiver. Hang in there.