Saturday, April 25, 2009

Miracles

OK, this is a post for everyone--so just read through and I promise you will all get something beneficial from it.

So I have been looking back on our marriage and looking at the struggles that have become true miracles and I must share—I especially share these stories for the benefit of those who are trying to have children and have not yet been blessed with children or who have had children and take it for granted what a miracle it truly is.

When we were first married we decided to wait at least a year before having a baby—you know the perfect family planning we all think will happen for us. Well, for some reason after only three months we felt strongly that we should start trying to get pregnant. This made me nervous and I think we both were excited but scared because just as I had been taught by all the examples in my family you "try" and 9 months later you have a baby!

Well, I know now that Heavenly Father had another plan—we must have needed some preparation for what was to enter our lives and he needed to know we had faith. So we "tried" to have a child for almost three years—it was one of the longest three year journeys of my life. When you so desire to have children, three years is a long wait. Finally after many awful and uncomfortable tests and studies we finally miraculously got pregnant with 9! What a welcome miracle he was too, especially when you think it will never happen. Oh, what a joy he was! And we made a decision that because of how much time it took to get pregnant with him that we should waste NO time and get started trying to have a baby right away. I was completely OK with having kids 9 months apart if that is what it took... well, two and a half years later we got two kids!!!

But, they we 12 and 10 when they came—yes, our neice and nephew! So now we had 3 children. But, still no pregnancy. After four and half years of waiting for another pregnancy I had given up, I got rid of all the baby stuff and became settled with the fact that I would never get pregnant again. Then we had a fourth child join us, he was 8 at the time, still no pregnancy. We felt that we would have these four kids and that is what the Heavenly Father had blessed us with. Then, miraculously six months later (a total of five years after having 9) we found out we were pregnant again!!!!! We were so happy and excited. Many negative pregnancy test later and TA DA finally a positive one! Well, you all know the next part... we later found out that the two children I gave birth to have Fragile X Syndrome.

Our dreams of having another were soon dashed into millions of pieces. How could we possibly bring another child into the world knowing we may have another with FXS (I was having a hard time knowing how to raise three children who were not my own and two children with disabilities—we felt very inadequate). We were scared and felt that because of the total of five children that we had been blessed with, we were done. So, we moved on with life. All along yearning for another child. We looked into the possibility of adoption, seriously. All in the meantime we got the constant question, "Are you having any more kids?" and my reply was always, "No. But, I have learned Heavenly Father has a great sense of humor and would love to see what I could do with three kids with FXS." So three and half years of yearning and wondering if we had made the right decision Heavenly Father's sense of humor comes out in full! I am eight weeks 2 days pregnant right now as I am typing this!!!!! It is truly a miracle, trust me, it is a miracle. We weren't trying to get pregnant— so there you go: three years of trying, then 5 years of trying and then, SURPRISE!!!! We are so ecstaticly happy we can hardly contain it. So, yes, I am not very far along, but I am already showing and we can't wait to tell everyone, so there it is. See, I told you it would be worth the read. So, the next question we get asked now is one of two: "Are you going to have an amnio done to test for FXS?" or "Are you scared that it will have FXS?" Here is the answer, "No I will not get an amnio done, it is most likely for me that it will have FXS, so I will just plan on that and if it has FXS... OK, and if it doesn't... OK and then, am I scared? Aren't we all, we always hope that our children will be perfect. But, I guess we all receive 'perfect' in different forms—we just don't realize it until we are holding them in our arms. All my kids are 'perfect.' As are yours..."



21 remarks:

Yo said...

Wow Rachel!! Congratulations and what a journey you and Marc have had. I know how hard it is to wait and truly what a miracle a little baby is. You are amazing and I admire all that you do.

Joel and Jessie said...

Well stated Rachel, we are excited for you guys. We love your kids and each one is so very special.
Joel

Amanda said...

Wow, that is a surprise! That is so exciting. I'm sure no matter what happens the baby will be perfect for you guys, if it has it or not. You guys have been through so much, and are so stong. congrats!

Andy said...

Congrats! I am one of those that truly knows what a miracle each child is, as I am sitting here holding Miracle #2 after 7 years of trying. And every child is perfect. Those that are born with challenges, and the blessed people like you who raise them have a special place in heaven. I am so happy for you.

Aaron and Megan said...

That is amazing, Congrats! It is funny how we have our plans and the Lord quickly lets us know who is in charge. We just have to keep trusting Him. We sure miss you at KWC. I hope the pregnancy goes well for you.

Brad.Lindsey.Lexi.Rowen said...

First, it was so fun seeing you at the wedding. You look great and I am very happy for you. Second, your children are perfect! I can tell that you are a great mother by all the wonderful things you do for them. I know that our Heavenly Father knows us well and knows our stregnths, he knows that you are the perfect mother for the wonderful children you have, and the wonderful child that will be joining your family this year. In the end, everything will work out as it should and you will be able to handle anything that comes your way. Again, CONGRATULATIONS! What an exciting time for you, your husband and your children.

Rosanne said...

congratulations wow what a great sense of humor God has. He knows that what He dishes out for you you can handle. I am amazed at what you two are doing with your family. I know that this baby will be a joy for you as has your other children.

Suzy said...

I have decided 2009 is the year for miracle babies! We wish you the best and can't wait to meet #3!

rach said...

Oh my gosh! Congratulations! I have goosebumps!!!

James said...

Congratulations! What a surprise! That will be so awesome. If anyone can handle it, you guys can.

Rochelle said...

I am SO EXCITED for you!!! I have been patiently waiting for you to announce it since the Buhlers aren't very good at keeping secrets:) Plus your lack in blogging lately confirmed something was up:) How fun that we get to be pregnant together again!!!! We better get that family picture going - and schedule another one next year!!! Let us know when you are ready!! Yipee congrats again!!!

Jared & Cheryl said...

Congratulations Rachael! I'm so happy for you and Marc.

Travis and Cami said...

ahhh, i'm so happy for you! congrats! :)

julianne orth said...

congrats! that is so awesome!

Lisa said...

I am so happy for you Rachel!!!! Let me know if you have any cravings for anything whole wheat and I will be there on the double.

Derek and Melissa said...

Congratulations! The Lord works in mysterious ways. You are such an amazing woman. Baby #3 is very blessed to be coming into your loving family.

Kandi said...

WOW! Rachael! What exciting news. Thanks for sharing. Heavenly Father really does know what he is doing!

Stephen Buhler said...

Congratulations! Rachael amd Marc, The Lord will always look out for his fathful ones, and you are one. What a blessing it is to have childern. The Lord has blessed your family in so many ways.

seesuerun said...

Sniff! You are one of those miracle Rach! I have always been amazed by you and will continue to be amazed!

amyandrandy said...

I read this a few days ago and I was running out the door and didn't get a chance to comment so here it goes... CONGRATS! Seriously could not be more excited. You are the cutest and most creative talented mom and this baby is so lucky to have you. Look at what you have done so far with your kids, man you we are so thrilled for you and the family! Hooray for miracles.

Matt and Shauna said...

Hi Rachel,

I found your blog on the class of 95 blog ... hope you don't mind. I love your blog and I especially love this post. Congratulations! I am so happy for you. Shauna Leavitt (Leifson)