Life has a Leash

I was taking my kids to summer camp this morning and came to a stop sign.

It was the usual stop sign.

Nothing new.

But this time I saw something interesting.

As I was waiting for the cross traffic to clear I couldn't help but watch intently, a woman pushing a stroller while talking on her cell phone and pulling a black lab on a leash.

Yes.

I said "pulling."

I think if the dog wasn't so determined to not fall she would have been dragging him.

She seemed oblivious to the dog's struggle and just kept pushing forward, busy on her cell phone, pushing the stroller with her elbow and pulling the leash with her free hand.

I, and my kids, were able to watch her cross all the way to the next corner because of the traffic and as I pulled through to turn the corner I rolled down my window and hollered with as much compassion as I could fit into a yell loud enough to reach across the street, "It's leg is tangled in the leash!"

As I was rolling out of her view I tried to smile really big so she knew that I wasn't trying to be rude, but helpful, I don't know that she was happy with my efforts either way and didn't seem to realize what I had said until she was in my rear view mirror. I saw her stop confused and start to untangle her dog from it's binds. I honestly don't think she realized that the dog was tangled.

I mean she had so much going on, she probably just thought her dog was being resistant to her direction.

After rolling up my Sister began to reprimand me for yelling at someone on the street and also told me that what I said was rude. I chuckled inside as this did seem rude as she most likely didn't understand why I was trying to get her attention.

Then during her lecture I started thinking about the life's lesson in that experience.

...

I'm sure you've noticed that I've been absent from my blog for some time and even with that I wasn't blogging very often since the beginning of the year.

My analogy:

I've been like that black lab we saw today--limping along, trying to keep up without falling, stumbling, getting hurt and not quite knowing how to get me leg out of the leash so that I could walk at pace I could handle and not end up getting dragged along.

Life has a way of wrapping it's will around us and pulling us along whether we feel like we can or not.

I couldn't be more proud of all that Brother did this past year.

I couldn't be more grateful to all those who helped him succeed.

I couldn't love more the people, friends and family who have loved him no matter what and have nurtured his desire to grow up and be a happy young man.

But it was all happening so fast, so much, so forced that I was falling behind in all that I had to do as a mom of children with special needs who are trying to be as "typical" as possible.

Overwhelmed and under-prepared I continued forward even if I was only limping along in the process.

And then watching him graduate high school was like finally crossing to the street corner so that I could stop and assess what was keeping me down.

There have been lots of "drivers" along the way who have tried to yell from their driver's side window where it all was seemed so "clear" to them,

"Oh, we all go through this. Welcome to having a high school graduate!"

"I know, it's so hard when they graduate... having to let them go and hoping they make the right choices in life."

or, "It's so hard on us mom's to let our kids grow up."

I'll let you figure out on your own how I feel about those comments. They weren't horrible. They were well-intended and they were meant to put us all on an equal playing ground. I get it, I do.

Anyway, to make a long story/analogy short; I finally got the leash that life was trying to drag my by and untangled it and I feel like Life only has to tug at me a little bit now to keep me moving.

Here are a few photos of Brother's big high school graduation so that you can smile and enjoy the fruits of my limping across this moment of my life.

After Seminary Graduation with his graduating peers from the ward
(one of these young men left for his mission last week and one of them will be leaving soon!)

I bribed him with sweet tarts for this selfie!

Before walking in to the building for graduation 

with Mrs. Glahn, the angel teacher

Friends and family filled a whole row ourselves! There to support!

He waves his "I love you" simple to all who are cheering for him as he walks to line up to receive his diploma.

I love these next few pictures! 

Yep. I'm proud! I'm so proud! This might have been the moment that life started to unwind the leash I was stumbling on...

And Mr. Keyes, Brother's Choir teacher! They ended up having such a great relationship. They both grew over 3 years!

Following his peers to take his hassle from the right to left side of the cap to symbolize the graduation.

He was checking his peers to see if he should be crying like he was probably feeling.

But then he recognizes the excitement and shows off his diploma!

Lauren! What would we have done this whole year without his best friend and our greatest ally!

Yaya was so proud of him!

His cheer coaches!

4 of the 5 Life Skills Graduates and his dear friends 

His sweetest friends!

His buddies!

Besties and Brother... that's what he calls us (smile)

Grandma Judy's gift. He was really proud!

His "other" family

I just had to share this photo. This is walking out to where we were supposed to meet Brother after graduation and Lil B was being loved by both our girls (all heart eye emoji's here)